Hi Julie, my unsolicited advise- talk it out with Cathy…Hope everything turns out ok bet. you both.

• Thanks Wenchie. I still have some pride left in me so why would I talk it out with her? Was I the one who started the rumor? I don’t know if everything will turn out ok between the two of us. As I have written, I don’t know her. If Kitty will say that was what happened, I will talk to that person. As it is, Kitty said she is sad that that person said such things about me. Kitty told me she even punched her son on his arm when said son told Kitty about me shouting at her. When I asked Kitty if she was not afraid of getting a blue slip for hitting the boy, she said “But what he said wasn’t true that’s why I punched him.” So there.

ayayay… Julie go to Kitty’s parents & talk to them. Cut to the chase na before some perverted story reach them.

You know yourself better than anyone, do you shout at your kids? Do you ever raise your voice to your students?

For what it’s worth, I just don’t imagine you ever berating a child like that.

• I leave it all to the nanny to talk to Kitty’s dad. Kitty’s mom is out of the country as of now. Truth is, my daughter Trixie once told me why I get mad at them easily when they fall short of my expectations, why I make things hard for them when I am patient with my students who are hard to teach. “Bakit madali ka magalit sa amin, pinagagawa mo kami ng maraming mahirap pero sa mga tinuturuan mo, hindi ka nagagalit kahit mahirap sila turuan.” Those more or less were the words she once told me.

i understand how you feel, but hopefully youre now feeling better. wag mo na pansinin siguro. your students and their parents know you better and that’s what matters most.

first time nya dyan diba? kaya siguro kung ano-ano ang napapansin, naghahanap ng mali. siya na ang may problema non.

• Thanks, Cess, for making me feel better.  I don’t know how people can say things like these about others,  and what they can get out of it.  Yeah, its  her first time, as I have stressed, didn’t even see her during that time she was there. To think the school they go to is a Christian school. Thanks.

Aw. That’s very harsh of her. Maybe she should have talked to you first before she made a fuss. It just shows how unprofessional she is. Prove her wrong na lang, I’m sure you’re not the kind of teacher who shouts at her students.

• Yes, harsh to render justice on me and gossip about me with other parents in the Christian school where their children are enrolled. I get “mad”, impatient, exasperate, and get tired when everything is not doing well. I bite my pen’s cap, crumple a paper or bite my tongue. I admit, I get more irritated and react more irrationally with my children than with me students.

Hello, Teacher Julie!

I hope you still remember me (and little Alex, though he is all of five feet six-and-a-half inches now). I ran into your blog while browsing through the Internet and was pleasantly surprised to find that Teacher Julie is the same T. Julie Alex loved as a little boy (saw your picture in The Mommy Journals).

I know this is way off your last post, but I guess I wanted to reach out to you and tell you that YOU made a difference in our lives. For what’s it worth, I hope you know that we appreciate your friendship, and yes, your devotion to teaching. Pag masama ang loob mo sa mundo, just think about the kids in your little class (wag na nating sabihin kung anong year, it’ll reveal my age, too, hehe) who thought the world of you, my son included.

Send me a line, please, and let’s talk one of these days. Old friendships should not be allowed to die.

Regards,
MommyPinky

• Mommy Pinky (even if we are the same age)! Thank you very much for dropping by my “home”. Thank you for the kind words. I am still almost the same person you met years ago except of course the physique changed.  Ahhh…if only I can bring back those days, when my parents were much more appreciative, much more understanding and supportive. I  have had more students back then gathered for two hours or more but no one complained that I shouted at any of my students even when the going was getting rough. You boosted my self-confidence a notch higher.  Thank you.

Julie, I agree with Auee, just talk to Kitty’s dad. As for my advise, it’s not naman nakaka-baba ng pride, you know, confront her to settle the issue. Yung tipong, hi Cathy, I heard you’re spreading stories abt me, blah blah…Baka biglang mamutla sa hiya….Oh well, that’s how I would have handled it as I’ve done few times before…he he.:-)

• Wenchie, Kitty’s nanny already talked to her dad. They have no complaints about me since Kitty said she likes me. I couldn’t and wouldn’t want to have to deal with that person right now while my wounds are still fresh.I may say expletives harsh words that I may later on regret and would later on be an evidence that indeed I do shout. Mahirap na, even I don’t like myself when I am angry.

Oh darling Teacher Julie I just sooo feel bad for you…You have every right to be angry and feel really down..Go cry it all…just spill it out…bang on a wall ( without anyone seeing!)…throw a tantrum inside the bathroom ( with the doors locked and out of hearing..)!!!

This is one of the most dreadful thing a devoted teacher such as you would have to endure.

( well…aside from discovering that your entire 4th year class planned to go on a mass outing without informing the head teacher and principal – who at that time happened to be me…Pray this never happens to you in case you become a high school teacher…)

After crying and gnashing…wash your face..put on your favorite lipstick..pinch your cheeks a cheery red..flip and toss your hair…..straighten your back then go… go on doing what you always do best…..teach and love the kids.

Talking it over with the parent is advisable but at the right moment. I don’t know if you should approach her or her you or how it will happen but trust and believe that the flow of the situation will be in your favor since you have done nothing conceivably wrong.

When the moment comes..courteously tell the person concerned that you understand her “concern” and point… buuuuut that you care for her daughter and you stand by your word that you did not raise your voice or have been unloving to the student in any way. Eventually, if she is logical and learned she will come to her senses and be calmed by the credibility of your stand.

If not..oh’ let her crazily rant her lungs out..She probably has some other problem she is venting out on you.

So sorry that this is long but I feel dreadfully bad that you are hurt..I too am a teacher…or was…or am still I think coz’ all my students still write to me and call me such….and I have helped teachers under me go through similar scenarios you are in…

Don’t forget what you are…You are a “special” teacher..

Hugsgsies’ to you and smile…This too shall pass!

mwah!

ps: yep’…taken at NUSA DUA…isn’t it lovely? ..My in laws are building a home there.

pss: Oh’ and I also handled special kids before…A couple are already in college :>

• Thanks, Lady Luxie. My ((hugs)) to you. Ahh…I have been teaching preschoolers who are in high school now. If it is my character to shout, would they still want to go to me, who have been their tutor, some for a decade already, some  8 or so years since? Sure, I do tell them what I expect them to do. I have rules for each and every one of them because I have too, because I want them to learn good work behavior, not just learn concepts and processes. In fact they can even read me like their own mother.  So how do they know when I am angry? I talk in a low voice. That’s what I do. For if I shout, they wouldn’t be able to hear me loud and clear. Thanks for visiting,

be well teacher julie..

• Daghang salamat, Luiza. (I know some Visayan words, hubby is Bol’anon.) You too, girl.

Julie, hay naku, sometimes we can never figure out what makes other people tick. Baka nag-hahaluccinate siya. The most obvious thing is to talk to your superior about this, give her a heads up of what’s happening. You never if this will be the last story that will come up. Who knows you might not be the first victim of this CH. See what your superior has to say about this. But if it’s me talking to both CH and the boy’s father is advisable because that’s a serious accusation.

• Geri, my student is a girl, the boy is this person’s son, The owner/directress of the center knows already. Kitty’s dad knows what happened and they have expressed intentions to continue with having sessions with me according to the nanny. As per advise of the Kitty’s dad, he wishes me to just focus on his daughter and not on that person. What really caught me ire and hurt me the most was why she has to talk ill about me with the other parents within the confines of their Christian school which also happens to be that community’s place of worship. My impressions about her was affirmed when Kitty told me about her son cornering  (Kitty) and telling her (Kitty) that her tutor (me) shouted at her (Kitty). Why include your son in on a dark secret if you have the best intentions? Oh well…

I’m so sorry you are upset over untrue accusations. Sadly, if teaching wasn’t stressful enough (and Special Education at that) you now have to deal with “troublesome” people.

I would seek advice from the owner/directress of the center where you work and go from there. It’s sad that some people are insecure enough to try and find blame in other professionals trying their best to do their job.

Take a deep breath and then go on being the creative, kind teacher that I know you are.

• The directress knows and she is equally disturbed about what this person said. Thank you very much for the kind words. I know you are also stressed with your work so your words are really very much appreciated. Take care.

[...] On the other hand, plastic is useful and here are some examples of toys made of plastic in the therapy room where I teach where this supposedly happened: [...]

Hi Ms. Julie,

Kindly delete my first comment which had typo errors. Thanks.

How awul. Sino ba yang CH na yan. hehe. You see,
I know the feeling of being unfairly judged and maligned. It happened to me when I was a student. One of the priests teaching (of all things) religion, overheard a remark in our class that he was “bookish”. It came from a boy seated behind me who was known to always corner the best in conduct honors but who, in truth, used crass language when teachers weren’t around. His family owned a university in our city, ergo, he was untouchable. Was I shocked when the priest started a tirade against me and the girl seated next to me. Apparently, he attributed the remark to me and another girl.There was even this line about “empty cans being the noisiest of all”. grrr. That really hurt considering that I won’t become a lawyer if I was an “empty can” like he said. I confronted him and he apologized. That experience served two purposes–it taught me that the world is an unfair world and that I learned not to be a pushover.

Empty can, hah!Sino kaya yung di marunong magturo.

Sorry for the lengthy comment, I just wanted you to know that there are really unfair people out there whose deplorable actions we can use to learn a lot about human nature.

• Thanks so much, Kim. What really hurt me was why she has to talk about me with other parents as well as involve her son too. If she has a problem with me, why didn’t she talked it out with me? I haven’t even “nakita ang dulo ng kuko niya ” so I don’t think she has any right to judge me. Hah!  Yes, there are unfair people, even from those who send their children to Christian schools.

You meet all kinds in the workplace, even online. You win many, you lose some. You’re still ahead and as one of the commentators here has said, you know yourself best. And I can see how parents who know you as teachers have made sparkling testimonials about you. Believe them. I believe them.

Yes, non confrontational meeting will help. Just be sure you have lef off steam and you’re in control. Say: “I understand you are saying such and such about me. I hope I am wrong. But If I am not, and you really have this impression ….. I want to correct it. etc. etc.”

Ah, Julie, I think you know what to do. Therea are special children. There are also special adults.

[...] course, not all experiences are worth remembering because there are rumor makers and judgmental mothers with sharp tongues. To them I say, hmph, they need people like me to help [...]